I protected what belongs to me.
Remembering Nealfire Week ♔ Day Two - Favorite Season
↳ "You have no idea what I’ve lived with. You’re so worried about you. You know what I’ve dealt with? Every night for more years than you could know… the last thing I see before sleep is the image of you—You and me over that pit, your hand wrapped around mine. And then you open your grip. And as I fall away, all I can see is your face. Choosing all… this crap over me. Letting me go. Now it’s my turn. Now I’m letting you go."
Roland Hood [3x18]
- take it all away, a swanfire mix (listen)
i. disarm (the civil wars). ii. dance on our graves (paper route). iii. jesus, jesus (noah gundersen). iv. cold water (damien rice). v. walk in the rain (passenger). vi. down (jason walker). vii. lover dearest (marianas trench). viii. run (snow patrol). ix. what if the storm ends (snow patrol). x. take it all away (red). xi. guilt (hurts). xii. missing you (jem). xiii. something to remind you (staind). xiv. angels or devils (dishwalla). xv. shattered (trading yesterday). xvi. saturn (sleeping at last). xvii. in my veins (andrew belle). xviii. you could be happy (cameron mitchell).
hookriels asked: ariel or ruby?
Remembering Nealfire week ★ Day 3 - favorite quotes
He’s [Jared Gilmore] that bad of a driver?
Remembering Nealfire Week - Day 2, Favorite Arc
Baelfire to Neal
do you ever think about baelfire as a kid— how for so long, it was just him and his timid papa with a bad leg in a poor village where law said at 14, he has to fight in a war that means near-certain death? how his father became the Dark One, further ostracizing them both— how he became afraid of his own father, how at 14, he had to be brave and selfless and adult enough to make the decision to leave not only his home, but his entire realm behind for the sake of his family? how he couldn’t be a child because he had the heavier burden of grasping desperately to hold on to what was left of his papa?
do you ever think about bae alone in victorian london— a world with no magic, a world with an entire different set of rules and logic and customs from anything he’s ever known, living on the streets and scrounging for scraps? bae begging not to be sent to the factories, bae having the burden of looking after himself lifted by the darlings— a mother to tuck him in at night, siblings to play with and bicker with, the chance to be a child for the first time in what must have felt like ages. bae giving that up to keep that family together.
do you ever think about baelfire’s neverland cave, how it was covered in pictures of places he’d been and people he’d known and families he didn’t get— everything he’d ever lost, because at least once, he’d had something more than this? bae counting the days until it seemed pointless, bae dreaming of his father coming to his rescue— bae rescuing himself, because he doesn’t have anyone to do it for him.
do you ever think about the neal we met in tallahassee— his lazy amusement at the pretty car thief stealing his stolen car, his near-manic energy and giddiness as he and emma steal and scrounge their way because he’s got her hand in his? the pure hope when he asks her to settle down with him. we’ve seen baelfire as a baby, as a child, as a teenager, we’ve literally watched him grow up, but when we meet him as neal— in a way, it’s the youngest we’ve ever gotten to see him be. because even with centuries of pain weighing on him, he’s found something to be happy about.
and it doesn’t last very long. when we meet him again, over a decade later, he’s worn down. he’s got a lot of guilt, a lot of regret, a lot of resignation. but he’s still trying. he’s still capable of that childlike energy— we see it when he’s playing swords with henry, when he’s teasing emma and laughing with her. he deserved so much happiness, so much more than he got— he only ever got little fleeting moments, little glimpses of what it might be like to be someone who gets a happily ever after. but he kept going. i’ve said before that i think he’s one of the most resilient characters on the show, and what’s so cool to me about his entire personal arc and development even outside of his relationship arcs, is that every little thing that’s ever happened to him has absolutely 100% factored into every choice he’s ever made, but they’ve been made with optimism, with goodness, with even if this doesn’t work out for me, that doesn’t mean i can’t try.
tl;dr baelfire was a child who face burdens grown adults would have broken down at and he grew up to be resilient and hopeful and brave and selfless and honorable both because of and despite ever shitty thing he ever went through and i love this character so so so much.